Goals

 

Give thanks to the Lord,

for He is good. His love last forever!

Psalm 136:1

 

 

 

I know I have written before about how hard Clara works just at the littlest things. Before now I never thought about just how hard bringing a pacie to your mouth, holding something with two hands, like a bottle, reaching for a toy, etc. But all these things and many more are for Clara and for any other children who are delayed.  I watch her everyday try and try these very things. I set goals for us, like she will sit up by her Birthday, Thanksgiving..and the date will get closer so I will set a new goal, like now Christmas. Sometimes I think I am being naive. But as one mom told me, everyone needs Hope.  I tell Jason all the time, if she can just sit up one day things will be so wonderful. I day dream all the time about the day I can sit her down and she can play. I want this particular thing more than ever.

 

In the Purple chair above Clara is exploring different textures hanging from her toy bar. She got a kick out of the pom pom, especially when I shook it. The beads are always a hit and they hang low enough she can grab them.

Clara is working on holding her bottle. It is very hard to get her arms/hands that far up. So I found these handles from a sippy cup and made do with them on her Dr. Browns bottles. I have personally never been able myself to get her to hold the bottle with both hands. I feel successful when she can get at least one hand up, but that doesn't always happen. Again another goal.

 

The above photo with the green thing in her mouth is something her feeding therapist uses for oral massage. Clara's solids eating has been postponed due to her starting to have an aversion of things going in  her mouth... unlike her pacie, her bottle, certain toys, hands. I don't understand, what about the spoon for the food, but she cries and get stressed out when she sees it coming. So oral massage it is. This is usually done with therapist, us or her nurses, starting on her arm with touch from one the above green thing and a nook. This movement, massage goes up her arm onto her cheek and if she opens her mouth we can try massage inside. If she pulls away or grimaces we have to start all over again up her arm.  Her last feeding therapy went great.

She is very successful with doing it all on  her own, most of the time.

Eventually we will try with food on the end of the nook.

Another goal. 

 

Right now Clara sees four therapists. PT, OT, feeding, vision. Some visits just rock and some visits she just doesn't want to do anything. For me when I work with her at home, I feel unsuccessful a lot of the time.  I just want to feel that I am helping her...in BIG ways. Such a mommy feeling I guess.

 

It has been a week since Clara's CP diagnosis. With an exception of the first two days, I have just prayed for the Lord to GIVE me peace. And I have felt that. I think the biggest thing I have focused on is just the day to day. HAVING CP doesn't change anything now, right now this day. We keep on working, and making goals and never giving up helping her to reach her potential. It doesn't change how I look at her, or how incredibly sweet she when she smiles. I love her no less, just more.

Every now and then I look to far ahead, I guess in my fashion wanting to to prepare myself. But that never does me any good. In time we will know more, and then I will still look at her the very same, with so much pride and love. We will still have our goals and work to do I am sure. I do feel robbed of not being able to look ahead with anticipation. But it is what it is. I'll just stay where we are now.

 

Goal: Take it one day at a time...forever.